fidzu : Jokes

He's had enough of fake birds since his 3rd divorce.

05 Feb 2012 9:15pm GMT

"There's no time for doors!" - No-one.

05 Feb 2012 9:15pm GMT

"Bring me a tiny toilet from which to sip"

05 Feb 2012 9:10pm GMT

Directed by Wes Anderson's admirer.

04 Feb 2012 8:00pm GMT

I haven't seen dogs this interested since any dog eating food.

04 Feb 2012 7:55pm GMT

Big deal, let's see him tie his shoelaces or engage in a loving relationship.

04 Feb 2012 7:40pm GMT

Best Videos of the Week (February 3, 2012)

03 Feb 2012 10:10pm GMT

We're all going to die. He's just going to die sooner than the rest of us, if he hasn't already.

03 Feb 2012 10:00pm GMT

Together, we can make the world a better place for sitting on the couch and watching TV.

03 Feb 2012 9:50pm GMT

To this day, he hates being around uncles and older sisters.

03 Feb 2012 9:45pm GMT

The bartender says "You can't have that thing in here! Get out!" The guy says "It's okay, this Alligator is highly trained. Just give me a few seconds and I'll show you." The bartender, intrigued, gives him the go-ahead. The man gingerly lifts the alligator up onto a table. By this point, everybody in the [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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2. A Pirate Walks Into A Bar So this pirate walks into a bar, his old favorite...
3. Blonde Walks Into The Library A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to...

03 Feb 2012 8:23pm GMT

Dan and David do a simple workout together.

03 Feb 2012 5:00pm GMT

Maybe it's premature to say this, but he's got my vote in the presidential election this year.

03 Feb 2012 1:06pm GMT

You've never seen aspergillus, fumigatus, botrytis, mucor, trichoderma and cladosporium like this before.

03 Feb 2012 1:05pm GMT

He's just mad because we've nearly made his species extinct.

03 Feb 2012 1:04pm GMT

Though I'm pretty sure he's really two short kids stacked on top of each other inside the uniform..

03 Feb 2012 1:03pm GMT

He was actually on The Voice, but he only made it to the semi-finals.

03 Feb 2012 1:02pm GMT

A pirate is starting his first day aboard his new ship and the captain is giving him the tour. ''There's the plank for trouble makers, there's the deck that needs swabbing everyday and there's the barrel for all you sexual needs.'' ''Whatcha mean? my sexual needs?'' ''Well, you stick your willy in the hole and [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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14 Jan 2012 4:26pm GMT

After waiting for what seemed like an eternity, the stewardess announces over the intercom that "we're just waiting for the pilots." The passengers look out the window and see two men, dressed as pilots walking towards the plane. Both men are using guide dogs and appear to be blind. There are murmurs among the passengers, [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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2. A Blonde's Flight To Chicago A commercial airplane is in flight to Chicago, when a blonde...
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13 Jan 2012 9:46pm GMT

A little old lady walks into Bank of America and asks to open a savings account. The new accounts receptionist first thinks this is strange, probably because everyone is leaving them for credit unions now. At any rate, the accounts person asks her how much she wanted to deposit to open the account, and the [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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22 Nov 2011 1:27am GMT

One afternoon, in a land where Eskimos and Scotsman run into each other on the highway fairly often, an Eskimo was driving down the road when his truck breaks down. Shortly after, a friendly Scotsman pulls off to the side of the road to help him. Upon inspecting the smoking engine, the Scot proclaims to [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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03 Nov 2011 2:49pm GMT

A man walks in a bar with his pet monkey. He sits down and orders a drink, meanwhile the monkey is running around all over the place and jumps up on a pool table. He grabs the 8 ball, shoves it into his mouth and swallows it hole. "Holy crap!" says the bartender, completely livid. [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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27 Oct 2011 3:30pm GMT

Two gentleman walked into the men's locker room at their prestigious country club; one was wearing a Harvard jacket, the other a Yale pullover. After taking a leak, the Harvard man stopped to wash his hands--while the Yale man walked towards the door. The Harvard man looked at the Yale man disapprovingly. "At Harvard, we [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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13 Sep 2011 3:16pm GMT

One fine morning in the Garden of Eden, God looked down upon Adam and noticed that he was looking glum. So the Lord said to Adam "What troubles you, my Son?" Adam looked up to God ad said "I'm lonely, Father. I have no one to talk to." So God said "Then I shall give [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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29 Aug 2011 3:33pm GMT

One fine afternoon a gentleman was walking down the street; and as he came around the corner he spotted a young boy sitting in front of the local candy shop. As he approached, he realized it was his neighbor's kid - Little Johnny. The boy was shoving sweet tarts and chocolate bars down his throat [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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03 Jun 2011 8:24pm GMT

Driving through town in his BMW, a successful young lawyer spotted two man on the side of the road eating grass out of somebody's yard. Moved by how desperate the men had become, he pulls over to have a word with them, "Hey fellas, what is going on? Why are you eating grass?" asks the [...] Similar Funny Jokes You Might Like:

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23 May 2011 8:09pm GMT